Anyway, I was pretty excited about Away We Go. With a cast featuring John Krasinski, Maya Rudolph, Jeff Daniels, Allison Janney, and Maggie Gyllenhaal, it is hard to go wrong. And with a director like Sam Mendes and a writer like Dave Eggers, there was absolutely no way that I would not like this movie. When the movie started and the music of Alexi Murdoch came on, well, that is when I fell in love.

The best part about this movie? Virtually every guy has a beard or awkward facial hair of some sort. Let’s take a closer look.

Alright. I’m just going to throw this out there. I hated John Krasinski’s beard. You know how some guys look like they are trying a little too hard with the beard thing? That’s exactly how this beard was. The beard embodied the whole “took a long time to look like it took no time at all” persona. It was pretty full, as you can see, but almost looked like something a seventeen-year-old hippie from my high school would have sported. It also kind of seems like it sprouted up one night and he couldn’t think of anything to do with it. This guy is like Teen Wolf or something. Don’t get me wrong, I loved his character in the movie, but the beard was all wrong. It distracted from the character instead of adding to it. See? I’m right about this. You’ll come around.

A guy that was totally rocking his facial hair: Jim Gaffigan. Check out that ’stache. It fit perfectly with his skeezy character and only complimented the look instead of distracting the viewer, in the way that John Krasinski’s managed to. Krasinski looks like a muppet (who wears visors, by the way?), but Gaffigan looks like pervert that I wouldn’t want to have any type of conversation with, which is exactly the look that Gaffigan’s character is supposed to be.

Jeff Daniels was another guy with excellent beardage. I was a little sad that his role was limited in the movie, but it was worth it. Check out that expertly salt-and-peppered furface. Maybe if Krasinski was a sixty-year-old man, his beard would be this impressive, but he’s not. I think it might be a steady combination of the coiff, beard, glasses and cableknit sweater. This beard implies wisdom, people, and fashionable wisdom, at that. Also: a love of Denmark, apparently.

Jeff Daniels’ beard is pretty hard to beat, but I think Chris Messina was giving him a run for his money. Feast your eyes on that scruff. That’s right. This beard sends out a signal that reads: I am really important and busy and I don’t care that I have facial hair. However, it’s a pretty user-friendly scruff level. This beard paired with the vest may complete my favorite ensemble of the movie, and believe you me, I was a fan of Rudolph’s pregnant dresses, so this is saying something. In the movie, Messina has about six hundred kids or something close to that, so he’s just being such a good dad, thinking of his jawline second to his children. That’s right. The beard is not only aesthetically pleasing, but it’s honorable.

Really, a great movie. I full out belly laughed during a few parts and I might have also shed a few tears, but don’t tell Luggage. Go see it. You will not be disappointed (in anything other than Krasinski’s stupid teen wolf beard, hopefully).

I am adding a link to JoBlo.com that pretty much sums up what I was in the midst of writing about… I had some great stuff… Alas, them JoBlo.com Boys beat me to it, so here ‘ya go CLICK HERE to see what our Brothers in Beard have to say about our next Beards of Hollywood Directors Cut Master….. Guilermo del Toro!

Unquestionably one of the finest directors working in Hollywood today. One whom I believe is JUST beginning to find his creative spark that will launch him to the forefront of everyone’s mind.

This man has 8 Films at some phase of development currently. I will repeat myself at the risk of being crude “8 FILMS” in development at the moment!! Friends that is a Speilbergian levels of commitment to the craft and shows his passion for his work like few before him.

1. Drood
2. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
3. Frankenstein
4. The Witches
5. Saturn and the End of Days
6. Champions
7. Deadman
8. Death: The High Cost of Living

And that list doesn’t include some of those mentioned in the JoBlo.com article I linked previously.. WOW… more like 10-12 films in the works!!!! Get ready to know this mans name.

Now, here is a rundown of the mans Film and TV accomplishments to date. Most of them you may not know, however, they are ALL worth your time, especially his crop of Hollywood films:

1. The Hobbit 2 (2012) (announced)
2. The Hobbit (2012) (announced)
3. Cinema16: World Short Films (2008) (V)
4. Hellboy II: The Golden Army (2008)
5. Pan’s Labyrinth (2006)
6. Hellboy (2004)
7. Blade II (2002)
8. The Devil’s Backbone (2001)
9. Mimic (1997)
10. Cronos (1993)
11. “Hora Marcada” (5 episodes, 1986-1989)
    - Hamburguesas (1989) TV episode
    - Caminos de Ayer (1988) TV episode
    - Con todo para llevar (1988) TV episode
    - Invasión (1988) TV episode
    - Les gourmets (1986) TV episode
12. Geometria (1987)
13. Doña Lupe (1985)

Looks like I see the HOBBIT on here (From our good Bearded Friend Peter Jackson, That crazy UNfat bearded bastard!)… Two Hobbits films actually! Sounds like lots of beards, in front of AND behind the camera and enough of the Shire Pipe Weed Little People to _______ well you fill in the blank.

Do FEET BEARDS COUNT? I’m just asking?

Looks like these cats at The Hobbit Blog will handle the bloggin’ for this series so go check them out. The site hasn’t been updated since April 24th, but then again there really isn’t TOO much news about these films at the moment, we will keep your blog locked and let you know what falls in and out of the cracks, ESPECIALLY if it has to do with beards… Which you already know.

Another reason to love the man…. He did trash ‘Twilight”. Here it pokes a little fun at that film and talks about his love of vampire movies and his plans for a trilogy of vampire films (is that like 15 movies now he is working on!!?!??) Consequently, if you want a good film about teenage vampire love go check out “Let The Right One In”, come back here and let us know what you think, I am sure I speak for us all when I say BRILLIANT!!

Come on folks honestly the man is the shit, plan and simple. He will continue to create great films just like the beards before him have done and keep us coming back for more.

del Toro Films: Official Fan website really says more than we can here, shit we just want you to know all about great beards and beard news. Check them out HERE.

Honestly this mans name truly is worthy of being added to the Beards Of Hollywood Directors Cut. You may not know his name yet but soon he will be added into the same sentence as Kubrick, Spielberg, Lucas, Jackson and so many more great bearded directors AND even those that prefer to go without the beard, but that is another bloggers story yet to be told!!

Here’s to you del Toro, watching you make it happen is just plain old fun. Keep it up.

‘Till Next Time.
Super E

There I said it, it’s now out there and if you don’t know who he is check out this recent post to funnyordie.com – NSFW!

Brilliant. Look to Funny or Die (Will Farrell and Adam McKay’s website full of funny shit) for more Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifinakis antics.

I will update this article after my screening of The Hangover next week, I have heard nothing but positive feedback from this new Todd Phillips film (Director of Old School, Bittersweet Motel, Road Trip AND Old School Dos- set for release in 2011) so far. Here is to hoping it lives up to the hype.

Zach has been paying his dues for years now and it finally looks like the world at large is ready for his brand of the funny. He has slummed it in films like Below, and stole the show in Bubble Boy! Currently he can be seen in theaters in the film Gigantic playing the character ‘Homeless Guy’, fucking brilliant! Set for future release he has 5 films in the works!! Stay busy Zach, it is good to see you doing your thing!

‘Till next time,
Super E

Now that I’ve hopefully earned your acceptance, let’s talk movie beards. I’m proud to say that I have found a well known actress who is sporting a full beard for her next roll. The seductress herself Salma Hayek is taking on the role of Madame Truska a.k.a “The Bearded Lady” in the upcoming Paul Weitz film Cirque Du Freak. The film is based on the best-selling book series by Darren Shan and is set to be released in 2010. With a cast including Willem Dafoe, John C. Reilly and Ken Watanabe, my interest is piqued.

A very hairy Hayek was photographed on the set in New Orleans City Park in Louisiana.
I can hear some of you already saying “But that’s not a real beard!” To you I say this…Pamela Anderson, Carmen Electra and Jenna Jameson’s boobs aren’t real…are they still boobs? I find this beard absolutely noteworthy. While this is her first full-beard film, this is not the only movie where Hayek has donned interesting facial hair. In the 2002 film Frida, she sported an impressive unibrow and soft mustache in her portrayal of the late artist Frida Kahlo.

This woman fully embraces and respects the power of facial hair in film. Some may find she’s ahead of her game while others probably want to toss her a bottle of Nair. However, here at ‘Beards of Hollywood’ …Selma we salute you.

Cheers,

The Lons

I wanted my first post to be about women with beards. However, there’s a lack of these in Hollywood, I have found. Am I wrong? Someone prove me wrong. There are plenty of them in the real world. Like that cashier at Wal-Mart? …

Instead, this is about Jack Black. This may seem random, but hear me out. I have always thought that certain guys only get girls because they have really good facial hair. Jack Black is single-handedly proving me right in the simple fact that chicks dig beards. Even ugly, fat, spazzy guys with sketchy beards.

Jack Black is sporting the “I’m… dirty” kind of beard that just screams laziness, but he pulls it off. It goes with the over-the-top kind of persona (is it a persona?) he usually has. It’s scruffy and it has holes. Like his acting career. Honestly, that otherwise-disgusting beard becomes endearing when paired with the chubby, hilarious kind of guy. But what really makes this facial hair impressive is his choice of mustache. Notice, it does not meet in the middle. That’s just good genes, people. You can’t fake that.

You’ll notice that this beard is so effective that it overrides the unfortunate “frosting” experience that’s going on up top and still allows for the girl-getting. And she’s cute, too, see? It’s impressive. I think we could all learn a thing or two from this Jack Black and his facial fur.

I really don’t know why he hasn’t made a movie since 1999… Oh wait, he is dead! Which really hurt the world of filmmaking and delt it a painful, sudden blow. Kubrick was finishing the final edit of the 1999 film, Eyes Wide Shut. Somwhere in the ballpark of 7,223,422 miles of film from what I have heard. I believe I actually rounded down, why wouldn’t he want to keep checking every single frame he shot of Nicole Kidman’s hot ass naked body?

Even his death can’t stop this man! There are currently 2 scripts that I am aware of making their rounds in Hollywood. The New York Times is reporting that his treatment for ‘Lunatic at Large’ (2010) is currently in development. The story focuses on a dude who gives a ride to a millionaire and in exchange the millionaire offers to trade lives with the guy, only to find out that the millionaire is really an escaped mental patient. The script is from his Paths of Glory era, so who knows. We all know that Darren Aronofsky has been back and forth with whether or not he will make Kubrick’s Napoleon treatment a reality but I say, hell yes Darren make this bitch, and GROW A BEARD ALREADY!

The last film to be taken from a Kubrick treatment was A.I. (I personally liked it, but thought that Spielberg wasn’t at his A game!) It was great to have one beard directing another beard’s work, and it worked out as a whole, I mean, Teddy was the shit and Chris Rock was miscast and shitty, so we had that going for us.

His work is legendary. His life was extraordinary, His antics were secondary to none. He was a recluse. He was a picture of perfection in all terms of the words (did you see him make Shelly Duvall cry in The Shining making of? Sweet tap dancing christ this man was scary. I blame the big whiskers!)

Here is a rundown of his bad assery:

1. Eyes Wide Shut (1999)
2. Full Metal Jacket (1987)
3. The Shining (1980)
4. Barry Lyndon (1975)
5. A Clockwork Orange (1971)
6. 2001: A Space Odyssey (1968)
7. Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)
8. Lolita (1962)
9. Spartacus (1960)
10. Paths of Glory (1957)
11. The Killing (1956)
12. Killer’s Kiss (1955)
13. The Seafarers (1953)
14. Fear and Desire (1953)
15. Day of the Fight (1951)
16. Flying Padre: An RKO-Pathe Screenliner (1951)

There really isn’t anything else to say. So here is one last sweet picture of the Legend.

Grey Beards ghost probably just chills with this cat in the netherworld talking about why in the fuck he never made a pirate movie!

Till next time,
Super E

They also have a couple bearded writers, which is the real reason I’m writing this. These guys write for one of the biggest movie news websites on the net, so that qualifies them for an article on our site.

This is Berge Garabedian AKA JoBlo, the founder and CEO of JoBlo.com. Pictured here with the great bearded Kevin Smith.

If you want news about beards and mustaches in Hollywood, come to our site first. But, if you want good movie news, be sure to check out Joblo.com. And for all the rest of the staff over at JoBlo without beards, I can’t take anything you say seriously until you grow some beards. haha I kid.

That’s Spanish for Beards! At least I’m pretty sure it is. It’s been a pretty long time since I was in a Spanish class. It’s Cinco de Mayo today, so I am going to post this picture of my all time favorite Latino actor, Danny Trejo. I guess he spent a lot of time in and out of jail as a kid. He must have learned all his good acting skills in San Quentin.

Oh! It is also apparently John Rhys-Davies birthday today. Happy birthday Gimli!